garden getaway

I need to get back to my career story, but another night.

I’ve been feeling anxious, very easily overwhelmed, and just bogged down by all the things I want, need, or at least should do. I had a running list in my head but wasn’t making any progress on it. Every day off, time was just squandered away on mindless games and such. And the down time was good, necessary even, but the list of things I had to take care of kept growing.

So today I wrote everything down in a spreadsheet. Over 60 items. No wonder I was overwhelmed and couldn’t start on anything. A lot of these are things I should’ve taken care of some time ago, and normally would’ve, but my life kind of paused for a while. As BTS sing in Tomorrow, “This is not a stop, but a pause for a brief rest in your life.” I always remember that line and it’s a good reminder for me.

I organized the list into six categories: appointments, errands, around the house, everyday chores, things we need, and habits to establish.

I had a sudden thought as I was typing these out that this could be a jeopardy game. “I’ll take ‘around the house’ for 200 please, Alex.”

“Answer: lack of light in the kitchen nook.”

“What is change the light bulbs in the ceiling fan?”

“Yes. Select again.”

Mom enjoyed watching Wheel and Jeopardy every night.

Anyway, seeing it all neatly typed into a spreadsheet, organized with the different categories, seems to be helping my anxiety levels about it at least. Now hopefully I’ll start crossing those things off. Like an eye doctor appointment so I can get new glasses because I know my prescription’s changed, plus the ones I have are way too scratched up. sigh

But the main thing I wanted to share tonight was about this quilt kit:

My mom gave me this kit when I saw her in February. She showed me all the fabrics for it and hoped I would make it since she knew she couldn’t. So of course I took the box full of fabrics, arranged in six different packages, all pre-cut to different sizes ranging from a five-inch square to a half yard.

She was also convinced she had ordered backing fabric for the quilt, but we searched and searched and couldn’t find it. We did find a package of extra fat quarters in the same prints that she had ordered, but no backing fabric. She was so stressed about the backing that I decided I was going to tell her I found it if it ever came up again, but it didn’t.

Now, this quilt is cute, but it’s just not me. Still, I wanted to honor her memory, her wish for me to make this quilt, but I knew this wasn’t it. So I measured all the different fabrics, skinny quarters, fat quarters, different sized squares, so I could get a ballpark of how much of each of the prints there was to work with.

And then I came up with a new design. Something simpler, since it’s been literally over a decade since I last pieced together any kind of patchwork design. And also because I had to work within the confines of a bunch of precut fabric.

I settled on a nine-block interspersed with whole squares, but I think it will come together well when it’s finally done. And I’m certain Mom would approve.

I added “sew at least one hour every weekend” to my to-do lists. I’ve gotten started. I have all the squares cut out, and strips to make the nine-blocks, and have the first batch of nine-blocks done. This wasn’t all done today, but getting that first batch of nine-blocks was part of this weekend’s one hour of sewing.

I don’t promise to post updates or even keep to the schedule, but here’s where I’m at for the moment:

 

Hope everyone has had some time to rest over the weekend. Much love to you all. 🤍

1 Response

  1. Deanna says:

    So know how you feel about the anxiety associated with a floating to-do list. Spreadsheet Jeopardy to the rescue!

    Your quilt beginning is beautiful. I admire so much that you can do that. The idea of honoring your mom but also staying true to yourself is even more beautiful.

    I think I might have been conflating your post with Susan’s ‘Happy Easter’ post when I was commenting on it earlier, so I’ll quote an executive summary of my ramble over there here for you:

    Some days are for moving mountains. Some days, existing is enough.

    Don’t let that spreadsheet’s content pressure you. Make your pause as brief or as non-brief as you need it to be. xo

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